I like my new method of blogging Survivor, waiting until Thursday morning to watch it, then blog right after.   Doing it on Wednesday night I’d have to worry about those west coasters reading spoilers and complaining, but now I can say what I want without worry of spoiling it!  I’m going to make up a 12 hour window after a show airs for someone to watch it before you’re allowed to post spoilers without a huge warning.  Why 12 hours?  Because it sounds cool.

I’d like to first make a comment about the title, Sarita said.    Obviously dead ducks can’t just sit on a lake, they’re dead!   But it made me wonder, do they still at least float?  And according to the random people answering questions at UK Yahoo, yes.. yes they do float, at least for a while.   The source being Pat T, and he’s yet to steer me wrong!  I mean the guy’s got a 50% “best answer” rating at Yahoo answers from 245 questions, that’s pretty amazing.

Why am I going off on random stuff before actually talking about the show?  Well, it was a pretty bland episode and I guess I’m just filling words.   Although to be fair I did crack up in real life seeing Phillip walk around in his “pink panties” and hearing Rob comment about them.   The Phillip / Rob scenes usually make the entire episodes.. in fact, I propose a spin-off sitcom featuring the pair.   In the sluggish economy, the Government had to lay off some “super agents”, with Phillip being one of them.   He moves into Rob’s studio apartment (who is living there because Amber threw him out due to her jealousies of all the girls from Survivor falling in love with him), and the pair have to share a bed together with Phillip wearing his pink panties every night.

The pair create a private detective firm and go around solving weird random cases, like trying to find out whether or not ducks actually float on water after they die.   I’ll watch it!  Set it up “USA Network”, you guys are known for the quirky crime solving shows!  (I want royalties though)  The name will play homage to The Pink Panther, and it’ll be called “The Pink Panties”.

Ok, back to the show..  I guess.   Even though I’d rather write about the new show I just created!

Here is the basic rundown for what’s going on in the game  (note: when I do bullet points, it’s a sign I’m too lazy to create a well written article trying to tie everything together)

  • Matt is rocking the shit out of his Redemption Area In The Jungle challenges (I can’t really call it an island – since it isn’t).    The guy is questioning Rob in the middle of putting together a puzzle and still dominates Kristina.
  • Because of that, Rob has to seriously consider getting Andrea out of the game before she comes back to bite him if/when Matt re-enters.  I don’t know when it’ll happen, but it really can’t be much longer.    My guess is merge, which should be happening in what, 3-4 more episodes tops?
  • Steve sounds like a moron when he talks.   His goal early on was to try and bring Stephanie and Krista into their 6 person alliance to form an 8 person alliance.   Hey buddy, that’s the whole tribe.   Who are you allying against if the whole tribe is together?  The ghost of Russell?  Are you going to keep trying to vote him out even though he’s on his way back home by now?  Maybe you should throw another competition, vote yourself out and make sure he’s really not hiding in Redemption Area In The Jungle.
  • I absolutely LOVE the plan of Stephanie and Krista flipping when tribes merge to cling on to Rob’s coattails.   This strategy works extremely well when you do absolutely nothing to stay in the game until merge.   Or were they using Brenda Lowe’s strategy of not begging to stay in the game in hopes people will randomly have a change of heart?  That’s clearly the winning strat!
  • The rest of the episode consisted of David crying because he didn’t get to solve the puzzle.  Ashley, Andrea and Natalie having a Cinemax moment under the waterfall.  Rob finding a clue to an idol he already has, and one of the most predictable votes we have seen this season, despite Jeff’s little attempt to cause drama by pulling the name “Steve” with the first two votes.   I’m sure there wasn’t any editing involved in that one!

Wake me when people actually start playing the game.    This had potential to be a great season, but it’s quickly becoming a snore fest.

I can’t even think of any talking points to get comments stirring this episode.    Should the coin landed on heads and they voted Stephanie out instead of Krista?    Does anyone care if David actually did the puzzle?

One good talking point is, what do you think should happen on Rob’s tribe?    He may not see it, but the walls are slowly closing in on him right now.  If his tribe wins out, he’ll have the numbers post-merge, but then he’ll have angry Andrea, Phillip and possibly Matt flipping to whoever is left on the other tribe.   If they lose and he gets rid of his threats, he’s going to go into the merge with an alliance of 4 vs 6. …  I almost wonder if that’s his best chance because that alliance of 6 is probably more vulnerable than winning back Andrea, Matt or Phillip (if Matt comes back).

What do you think Rob should do to stay in this game?  What’s his best course of action?

I wasn’t going to post a Survivor blog this week.  Why?  Truthfully I am getting a bit burnt out on blogging and needed a little break.  I’m not sure people even read the stuff considering my posts usually get no comments.   Taking screen-shots is also very time consuming, and it usually winds up with me watching the episode like 3-4x which leads to quick burnout there.   I decided to skip the screen-shots this post to see how it goes, but maybe later in the week I’ll run through and snag some shots if I get any requests for anything specific.  I know there were a lot of bikini shots out there for the guy viewers / readers, so I’m sure people will be expecting some sort of eye candy this post.

Considering  I didn’t plan on blogging about it, I didn’t watch it with my trusty notepad this week, so it’s very likely I will miss a lot of stuff to talk about.  I do know one thing I want to talk about, is the immunity idol and how it possession of it forces the holder to lose any brain power they have.    It seems the longer someone holds it, the more they forget how to play the game and just say / do dumb things, as Ralph proved to us this week.  To be fair, I’m not really sure the guy had much brain power to begin with though.

I never really understood the reasoning behind revealing to more than your closest ally that you have the idol.  I’ve seen it numerous times over the years, and the only time it has ever worked out has been Russell, but that was only due in large part to a) Smart people want to sit next to him in the finals anyway and b) A bit of luck at times.    Ralph randomly deciding he has to show the entire tribe that he has a huge position of strength was mind boggling to say the least.    He had a good spot on his tribe as the hard working redneck who will carry the tribe through some tough physical challenges, but then decides that wasn’t good enough, he needed to put a target on his back.

The best part of the episode was during the Redemption Island duel between Matt and Russell, as most know by now, it was won by Matt.   Russell had his breakdown which we’ve all seen before, but he explains he’s mostly upset he was beaten by a bunch of dummies.  Ralph then instantly proves his point by letting him – and the other tribe know – that he’s not dumb because he found the idol first.   Well played Russell, if you’re going to go home, may as well take a few with you.     By the way, he said he’s never playing again, and under the same situation I’d agree with him, but I have a hard time believing he wouldn’t come back in a second for another All-Stars run.

The rest of the episode was fairly weak, especially during the challenge which almost made me want to shut it off right there when it was basically sponsored by Sears.   The only thing missing from the challenge was for them to spell out the word “SEARS” with the wooden planks before running up.   I hate sponsored challenges and product placement, and I’m going to hate it in a few weeks when they have the movie themed one which the reward is going to pre-screen another awful movie (more like punishment).   I still have visions of Benry forcing his laughter trying to watch Gulliver’s Travels.

(btw, you know a movie is bad when you screen it to a few people who haven’t had any entertainment for weeks, and they need to force laughter)

Not surprisingly, the male dominated team won the physical challenge on the backs of Ralph and Mike who killed their parts of it.  Grant made some good pushes to keep his tribe in, but the advantage Ralph and Mike gave were just too much for Rob’s team to overcome, so yet again it was time for tribal council.

In a not-so-surprising move, the decision was going to be a toss-up between Kristina the player, and Phillip the nutjob.  They had to decide if they wanted to be annoyed for another few days while getting out the potential threat, or cut Phillip loose before they lost their mind.   They choose getting rid of Kristina (Rob’s biggest threat) first and deal with Phillip for another few days… and they didn’t even have to throw a challenge to do so.

Was getting rid of Kristina the right move?    If you were Rob, would you rather risk having her flip a few people and blind-side you for the sake of camp harmony?   Honestly this would have been a tough decision to make for me, Rob still doesn’t have the numbers considering Andrea is still scorned and easily flippable.   What are your thoughts on who should have gone home?   Let’s see if I can actually get some replies this week!

I don’t know what’s worse in a competition, pure quitters like NaOnka and Kelly Purple, or people who throw challenges.   In the game of Survivor, I’d have to say those who throw challenges for a few reasons.  Every season, the “recruited” to “applied” ratio is getting more and more in favor of the recruited – those who were approached by Survivor producers to be on the show for ratings.   Kelly Purple is an example of someone who was recruited – most likely due to her very strong personality (sarcasm alert) – so it’s no wonder she bailed when it started getting rough on her.  She went to get publicity to help her modeling career, mission accomplished, so it was time to stop the torture and leave the game.  You can blame the producers for a quitter more than the quitter, especially in the case of a recruit.

Those who throw a challenge though, it’s hard to forgive in this game, especially this early in.  Anyone who has seen more than 5 minutes of the shows 1 million seasons knows things can turn really quickly, and one thing you don’t want to do is willingly hand over numbers because someone makes you a sad panda in camp.   When you factor in it’s been like a week since the show started and only 2 people have been voted out, those on Zapatera are a bunch of dumb shits so far.

Before I keep going off on that, other stuff did happen this episode, including the first person officially eliminated from the game, which is weird to see on the 3rd episode, but I kind of like it so far.   Matt and Franchesqua were set to “duel” on Redemption Island (which doesn’t appear to actually be an island), and the loser will be sent home for good,  with the winner living another day.   Both tribes had two people randomly selected to go witness the first challenge for some reason.  Andrea was one of those chosen which made her happy allowing her to see her new bff/boyfriend (that she’s known a week) at least one last time before he’s sent back to the real world.  This also gave her a chance to let him know she didn’t vote for him, just in case he made it back she can have a good alliance… as if that were ever in doubt.

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Andrea and Matt getting close on the islandSo we’re two weeks into the season of Survivor: Redemption Island, and I already think it’s better than the entire least season.   It’s hard for me to say because I’ve actually chatted with quite a few contestants, and many of them were extremely friendly and polite despite the amount of messages I’m sure they received on facebook.    It’s just that last season was doomed from the start because of the horrible tribe setups, it never really found it’s legs.

The redemption island part of this season?  The most hyped up feature of the new season has yet to even have any impact on the game or strategy.    This week featured Francesca going to the island, lighting a fire, and writing in a journal..  easily the most uneventful thing the show has aired in many seasons now, that includes pretty much every moment Dan was on air last season.    You know you’re going to have a good season when you bring Rob and Russell back in the game, period.    And that brings us to this week’s random thoughts about Survivor segment that I just made up now!

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His foot makes his mouth dry

And we’re off!  The much anticipated season of Survivor has arrived, with old favorites Rob Mariano and Russell Hantz returning to the game to compete against each other, and the episode really didn’t disappoint.

Right away we got the long introduction with Jeff hyping up the season, and we can clearly see just from the helicopter ride that teams were going to be much more even than they were last season, regardless of the split.     No grandma Jane’s, no guy with about zero cartilage left in his knees, and no crazy old guy rambling about random things..  wait, scratch that last one.  There was Phillip, and based on this episode, I can simply say I hope he remains on the season for as long as possible. The guy screams entertainment.

The best part of the season is easily the fact that two of my personal favorite players are returning, Rob and Russell.   Love them or hate them, both of those players know how to play this game, and it’s great to see them both back in the same season, and competing against each other.   However, did anyone notice Russell sounds different?    Maybe he hit puberty late or something because his voice is definitely different.

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Show: Survivor Redemption Island
Contestant:  Kristina Kell
Age: 46
Tribe: Ometepe

Survivor Redemption Island Kristina KellKristina Kell is a 46 year old law student from California, and the second “KK” in a row for me to preview (the other being beauty queen Krista Klumpp).   Why is this significant?  It’s not at all, in fact it’s probably the least useful information you can gain about Kristina, but there really isn’t a whole lot to go on, so I’m just grasping for straws.

I do know she has an autistic child, which she puts on her profile, but even that isn’t noteworthy because a lot of people have autistic children.

One interesting part about her is she says “if you don’t know lying and manipulating are part of the game, you’re an idiot” on her bio, but if that was a practice run for the game, she’s already failed and will be a quick exit.   Part of manipulating is actually being able to convince someone to like you even more after they found out you were lying, and you don’t do that by calling them an idiot.   I get the “I want to be blunt” attitude with that statement, but that shit doesn’t work on other people who are also lying and trying to manipulate you.

After the jump are a few more photos of Kristina Kell

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