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You know Survivor is well under way when the opening few scenes of the episode are last weeks losing tribe huddling around pretending everything is ok after a brutal tribal council that night.   I always get a kick out of this part of the episode, you get to see these people stand around and try to be friendly and nice after some nasty shit was said just an hour or so prior.   It’s like having a nasty breakup with someone where you say the worst things in the world to each other, only to realize you’re 2 hours away from home and need to drive together in one of the most awkward moments of your life.   That’s Survivor for you!

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Coach Trying To Recruit Monkeys

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Yay!  It’s Wednesday, and you know what that means??  Survivor Night!!! Well, Survivor, Hell’s Kitchen, Modern Family, and Criminal Minds, plus a Teen Mom blog entry from Melinda (she has to wait a day for Hulu, lame).   Man, why did they make Wednesday’s so jammed with shows?   Oh well, it keeps us busy I guess, and keeps everyone entertained with great Tyrone reaction moments!

Seriously, this guy is quickly becoming one of my favorite Survivor cast members ever!  Even Melinda is rooting for him, and she doesn’t watch Survivor.   This season has a really great cast so far, especially since they ditched Shannon, and now they’re left with some really good.   Even Jimmy Johnson, who I thought was going to annoy the shit out of me, has won me over and I’m pulling for him as well.

Kelly Bruno is simply bad ass, almost as much as Claire from Team Watermelon FaceHolly Hoffman is really a nice person even though she came off as a little whacky last episode, and the girls are all hot.  Brenda Lowe is wildly popular,  and could be a long term fan favorite with people.  By the way, I get asked a lot, Brenda’s ethnicity is half Bolivian, half Chinese, and all hot!

So, to get you in the mood for Survivor night, here is more of Tyrone being awesome after the jump

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Come on Jimmy, I know you’re having a tough time out there but get it together, bro.  You won 2 Super Bowls, had your pick of any of Troy Aikman’s sloppy seconds, and basically owned the city of Dallas and now you’re on the beach on national TV looking like that?  It looks like you shit yourself there!  Pick up the pieces, and carry Espada on your back.  You can do it!

Survivor Nicaragua Contestant:  Jimmy Johnson
Age: 67
Tribe: Espada

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Our next cast member on Celebrity Survivor… err, I mean Survivor Nicaragua, is former NFL Head Coach Jimmy Johnson.   That’s right, the guy who rambles on about who knows what during NFL pre-game shows is going to try to be humble and fly under the radar on Survivor and actually convince others he’s a safe player to bring to the finals.

While he does make a good argument that due to his celebrity status, nobody in their right mind is going to vote for him should he make final 3, but what he doesn’t take into account is that he’s about 100 years old and very obnoxious (at least acts that way on his pre-game show), and they’re not going to MAKE it to the final 3 if they carry his dead weight on their shoulders.

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Should he somehow survive the first half of the game and make it post-merge, I can see his theory taking effect, but the reality is that the Espada tribe is going to need it’s strongest players while they’re together in order to not see tribal council every week.  For that reason, I see Jimmy being the 2nd-3rd Espada member booted.

My odds of winning: 250-1