I had the brilliant idea of turning Teen Mom into a drinking game.  Take a drink every time Amber and Gary have an argument, a drink every time they show Ryan staring blankly into space, take a shot every time Farrah puts Sophia in danger, take two shots if Sophia gets injured from it, take a drink every time they have to caption Kyle speaking; but then I realized I would be totally snockered within 20 minutes and this blog post would be nothing but incoherent babble…more than usual anyway.

AMBER

I knew things weren’t going to go well for the dynamic duo when they had an argument within the first 5 minutes of the episode.  They signed up for dance lessons to get prepped for their wedding.  Do people actually do this?  I see it a lot on TV, but I don’t know any couples in real life who have actually done it.  So the instructor asks when their wedding is and they don’t know.  Amber replies with “maybe in 2 to 4 months.”  Gary’s all, “20 months sounds good to me, hardy har har.”  Seriously, Gary?  Do you want Amber to bitch slap you again?  I’m beginning to think he gets off on it.  That gets all squared away and they dance and I see a dress I totally covet.

amberballgown

The shocker comes next!

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