Survivor – “She Seems Like She’s On Her Period All The Time”

Alina Talking About NaOnka

So last week we were left off with a teaser of Jeff saying “drop your buffs”, which of course resulted in the first few minutes of the show doing a little foreshadowing of this event playing clips of Holly in camp saying how she felt like she was on the outs, and Marty saying something that probably tempted the producers to make the change in the first place.   “It would take something extraordinary, off the charts, completely whacked out to disturb my plans now”  and bang, there you have it Marty, be prepared for just such a thing because this week it’s tribe mix up time!

And of course on the LaFlor tribe, you had some more foreshadowing before the big announcement, this time by NaOnka stating how her 5 person alliance is the bomb and they are controlling the entire game.  She’s so happy and cheery, life is good for Nay… for now.

Reward Challenge

Reaction To the Swap

Right away, we head into our first reward challenge of the season, which win or lose, it’s still going to be a reward for a few people who were likely to be the next 4 voted out (Kelly Bruno, Alina, Holly, and Jane).   Jeff announces that the format they originally started with (old vs young) is scrapped and it’s time for teams to drop their buffs.   This is seriously one of the strangest things I’ve seen happen in Survivor in a long time.    This is some new coke type of shit here, like the producers sat around and watched their awful job at casting a super buff young tribe vs a mostly unfit old tribe completely blow up in their face.

Not only was the idea of old vs young scrapped after just 4 tribal councils.  3 of those were with the old tribe, and 1 was with the young tribe pretty much only because the oldies had the medallion of power, which btw was also scrapped.   The medallion was supposed to be some crutch to help a team (*cough* old team) win here and there, but I don’t think they were expecting the results they were seeing.  Granted LaFlor used the medallion last week, it was clear even without it, they would have dominated that challenge.  So there you have it, no more old vs young, it’s now just a regular game of Espada vs LaFlor.

Jeff went around and had people pick rocks, those who had the white rocks were captains, and that was Holly Hoffman and Brenda Lowe.  Holly was told to pick 4 people from the LaFlor tribe she wanted, and Brenda was told to pick 3 oldies.  Those chosen were Jane, Jill, Marty, Alina, Benry, Chase and NaOnka.   So the new tribes look like this:

New Coke… err, New LaFlor:

Brenda Lowe
Marty Piombo
Jill Behm
Kelly Shinn
Jane Bright
Kelly Bruno
Judson Fabio

New Pepsi… err New Espada

Tyrone Davis
Holly Hoffman
Alina Wilson
Dan Lembo
Yve Rojas
Chase Rice
NaOnka Mixon

Marty Missing a catch in a challenge

Marty Missing The Catch

And right away, it was time to put these new teams to the challenge.   This was a strict reward challenge, which were 2 chicken and 1 rooster, yums.   The challenge was a weird one where one member throws a ball up this ramp, then it comes down bouncing off little poles on the way down, like something you’d see at a casino with quarters, and 2 members from the opposing tribe are there trying to catch it.  Sounds easy, but a last second bounce can be difficult to snag.

The challenge was a little more like what you’d expect a challenge to be, it went back and forth with points until get this, Espada actually won!  That’s right, that team that couldn’t finally won a challenge and not only had some eggs or chicken to eat, but a nice shot in the arm of youth and confidence heading back to camp.

Espada Wins The Challenge!

Espada Pre-Challenge

Tyrone speaking to new tribe

Tyrone Laying Down The Law

All the good will was felt by most, until Tyrone decided to lay down the law with the kids telling them how to gather wood, pick up sticks and take shits.  I love the guy, but what a buzz kill, I mean NaOnka is perfectly capable of shitting, she does so out of her mouth nearly every time she speaks.   Which by the way brings me to a little rant about her.  She gets shit on a lot on pretty much every board I read, so I try not to do it here, but it’s so hard not to.  After Tyrone told people about the rules of the tribe, she says to the camera “Don’t think you’re a G (gangster) because you’re not“.   The guy is simply telling people about the camp and she says this shit.. how is he acting like a “G”?   I know she grew up in a rough neighborhood, had it rough and believe it or not, I can relate, but she needs to relax with this attitude a bit.  It got old the first week.

Holly working alina and naonka

Holly Working Alina & NaOnka

Aside from that, Holly sees this as an opportunity to go from ‘on the outs‘ to inside a little alliance as she gets close with NaOnka and Alina, and pretty much all the young new tribe members.   Is this a bad move on her part?  Well, from her point of view, she was likely going home next should the change never happen, but on the other hand, you just absorbed half a tribe, they’re likely going to stick together, so it may be best to stick with your old alliance and try to rough the waters.   I mean even Alina and NaOnka were together and they hate each other.  This may be a mistake that will cost her down the line, we’ll have to see.

Later on that day, a dreaded rain storm churns and pours down on Espada, and NaOnka acts like she’s been spending the past few weeks in a luxury resort because she’s shaking and crying over the fact that she’s getting a little wet.  Alina, trying to talk some sense into her says the obvious, they’re on a beach, they’re all wet!  Deal with it!  I mean seriously, Alina may have become the new Eliza here in smacking someone in the face with reality  “It’s a stick!”   I think I’m going to like her as the season progresses!

LaFlor Pre-Challenge

Kelly Bruno walking down beach carrying sticks

Typical Day In LaFlor

Ahh LaFlor side, where the sun is always shining, birds are always chirping, and squirrels sing the contestants to sleep at night.   This is really the most boring side to blog, and if not for Brenda Lowe, Kelly Bruno, Alina and Kelly Shinn walking around in bikinis or their bra/panties all day, they’d probably lose half their male viewers during LaFlor segments.   With Russell (err, Marty) in the mix, that may change soon though.

Kelly Shinn excited about voting for Marty

Kelly Knows Who She's Voting For Next

Right away Marty is sitting with Fabio and chatting with him about the NaOnka / Kelly Bruno situation and watching a former Yahoo! exec chatting with a surfer kid about strategy is one of the more uncomfortably funny things you’ll see on TV these days.   Marty then decides “Hey, I’m going to keep acting like Russell and show my immunity idol to the tribe daring them to do something about it while masking it with trust”.   They all pretty much see right through this and everyone aside maybe Fabio started salivating just waiting for the next tribal council to blindside Marty.

To be fair, however, Marty did do a good job at convincing the team that they should have done something about the member who is no longer on their tribe any more.  Good job, Marty.

Immunity Challenge

Well, the rain finally ended in Nicaragua and it was time to do a challenge, this time 3 members from each tribe get to be dunked in water over and over.  Now, I know I’m not alone when I was thinking “please let it be NaOnka, please let it be NaOnka”.. not because I want to see her dunked, just because I want to see her just snap and lose it on TV.  Am I mean?  I think it would make good entertainment!  But, sadly it was not NaOnka.    Those getting a nice afternoon dunk in water would be Brenda, Kelly Bruno and Kelly Shinn for LaFlor, and Alina, Holly and Yve for Espada.

The object of this challenge was for those 3 people to be strapped to a wheel and spun around by their team, constantly dunked in water.  Those being dunked needed to fill their mouth with water then spit it down a tube which fills up and eventually shoots out a ball.  Someone else takes the ball and throws it until they break 5 tiles.

Brenda missing the bucket in challenge

Going too fast!

Espada decided for this challenge they would take the slow and steady approach, while LaFlor would be aggressive and fast, spinning the girls so fast you thought they were gonna shoot off the wheel.    Well, the slow and steady trick really paid off as the Espada women were able to shoot large amounts of water down the tube while the LaFlor girls were going so fast they kept missing entirely.  That allowed the ball to come free for Espada first, and give them an extra shot or two before LaFlor was ready.

Throwing for LaFlor was Benry and Tyrone, while Jane and Fabio were throwing for LaFlor.   Like the reward challenge, this was also yet another even race going 1-0 Espada, then 1-1, 1-2, 2-2, 2-3, 2-4, 3-4, 4-4 and a race between Benry and Fabio.  One shot each, Benry throws!….. Misses.     Fabio is up, he gives it a throw………

LaFlor Wins Again!

Like Jeff said, new team, same result.  Espada is heading to tribal that  night.

benry is not used to losing

Benry Not Used To Losing

Benry is not used to losing

Jane is happy to finally win a challenge

Laflor Wins Yet Again, Jane Is Happy

.. but Jane can get used to it!

Espada Pre-Tribal

yve and alina talking about who to vote out

Yve And Alina Planning

The Espada tribe wasn’t particularly exciting pre-tribal, except for perhaps Chicken-Gate with Tyrone.    The tribe wants to eat a chicken because they’re starving, but Tyrone says no, save them for eggs.   They all take a vote and overrule Tyrone, so he goes and pouts for a bit while Chase breaks the chickens neck and cooks it for dinner.   At dinner, Tyrone tells everyone to “look out for your neighbor” regarding eating, which they all meant as share..  little did they know, it simply meant “look out for your neighbor because he may try to take more chicken than you, so slice his throat if he does“.   Just a simple misunderstanding.  Needless to say, none were too happy when Tyrone took a lot more chicken than everyone else, and that’s not a good thing when heading into ….

Tribal Council

Ahh yes, a place Espada is all too familiar with.  Old players, young players, doesn’t mean, Espada is Espada and they’ll be in tribal week after week.

One last stink eye from tyrone?

One Last Stink-Eye?

Old and new all settle in for a probing from Jeff which begins with the leadership on the tribe.  The entire tribe essentially says they’re unhappy with the way Tyrone is leading, since they’re used to the bunnies and sunshine over at LaFlor, and bring up how they got a big lecture from him as soon as they got in camp, which of course was met with a great stink eye only Tyrone can produce.

NaOnka is also brought up, and her lack of desire to stay there yet everyone coaching her on, and Jeff brings up an eye opening point to them.  She’s competing with them for a million dollars, are you really trying to convince her to stay if she’s willing to go?  Benry doesn’t quite understand that situation, but Yve chimes in and does question NaOnka’s commitment to the tribe and game.

With that, the voting begins..








And with the vote of 6-2….

Tyrone is voted off of Survivor 🙁

tyrone has been voted off survivor

I'll Miss Your Crazy Faces, Tyrone

And, for your viewing pleasure, a complete gallery of Survivor photos, some which didn’t make it into the recap:

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