Survivor – You Get To Milk Your Own Milk

Kelly Shinn Talking about milking milkLast week on Survivor: Nicaragua was full of toilet butts, blindsides, and a double elimination, to say there was a drop off in excitement between the weeks would be an understatement.  The biggest surprise this week was that just a day after saying Kelly Shinn never speaks, she actually got a few lines on camera, by herself!  After those lines, I’m not sure we’ll be hearing from her again.

It was good to finally hear her talk, or even see she really existed, but between her few speaking parts and my post yesterday about how that is sometimes the kiss of death, I was wondering if her number was up tonight.   Keep reading to find out..

After the double elimination, the show started out with the teams going back to their camps chatting about who they voted out, and again how Dan is still in the game.  This is probably the biggest mystery so far this season, and even he is a bit shocked by it calling himself the Teflon Dan.

Teflon Dan photo

Meet Teflon Dan

On the LaFlor side, Marty has a very weird conversation with Jane and realizes she wants nothing to do with him and had no shot at an alliance with her since he shunned her while they were on Espada together.   This probably should have been obvious to Marty seeing as she’s been basically treating the original LaFlor tribe like her own kids since they went over there, but maybe he just didn’t want to see the facts.

Also, it appears the one challenge a week thing is out as for the 2nd week in a row, we hit up a challenge within 5 minutes into the show.  I’m not sure how I feel about that.  As a blogger, I guess it makes my job easier, but I do enjoy watching the character development that happens with only one challenge per week.  With two, it feels like 75% of the show is taken up by challenges or tribal council.

Reward Challenge

This was a weird challenge, where one player stands on a pole sticking out water, while the other team one by one runs at them, jumps into the water, and as they’re jumping in, they have to throw the ball into the net behind the defender.   Kind of weird they make them do a jump into the water to increase the difficulty from about “Really Easy” to just “Easy”, and it also makes it the most physical challenge they’ve had almost all season.

Dan Lembo in a reward challenge throwing ball

Dan preparing the cannon arm

The match was going back and forth up until 2-2, when Teflon Dan stepped up to the plate for his turn, and he did not disappoint.  With a huge slow walking start, Dan the man prepared his cannon to blast right through Fabio, but instead tricked him out with a soft throw instead.. so soft that it didn’t even reach Fabio.  Oh, and he also couldn’t jump off the platform into the water, which disqualified his awful throw anyway.   Dan has a good plan going, this guy is easily going to the final 5, as anyone would be absolutely foolish to write his name down.   Going into the merge, carrying Dan along is like a free pass where you can get rid of him any time, and even if he does make the final 3, you’re going to have to be one evil bastard to lose votes to him.  The guy has done absolutely nothing all game so far, so even the “it was my strategy to go under the radar” won’t work.

Fabio taking a piss in the pool

Fabio Peeing in Pool

Back to the match, where Fabio was so built up from the anticipation of Dan’s rocket arm, that he couldn’t hold in his piss any longer, so he did what any awesome person would do, just go in the pool!   Haha this guy is great, I mean it.  Fabio for final 3!

After Jud relieved himself in the pool, Espada realized they were jumping into the piss water and started scoring again, and the game was quickly won 5-3 after that.  Congrats to Espada for winning a trip to some farm where they get to ride horses, eat nice food and yes, even “milk their own milk”.

random Brenda Lowe ass shot

Random Brenda Lowe Butt Shot

There wasn’t much in terms of strategy, game-play, or actual discussion between the Reward Challenge and the Immunity Challenge, so I’ll spare you the boring stuff like Alina crying over dinner and the show desperately trying to build up some suspenseful moment of Jane catching fish and eating it on her own in the woods.  Even the producers knew this segment was extremely boring which is why they had two back to back full body shots of Kelly Shinn then Brenda Lowe in order to keep the male viewers happy.    I think the editors are required to have at least 1 Brenda Lowe butt shot per episode quota.

Immunity Challenge

I am going to take a guess that the challenges were all pre-planned as the format of “Old vs Young” was being discussed because like most of the challenges in the game, this was yet another really non physical challenge.  In seasons past, we’ve seen some real tough challenges where players have to try to face off against someone like James in an American Gladiators type of format, but not this season.  We’ve deal with mostly tile breaking, guiding water, and catching balls.. kind of disappointing, and this challenge was no different.

teams on the challenge platform

Rolling The Balls

This was reminiscent of the first challenge this season where they guided water down some tube, but instead of water, this time it was the same balls used in the Reward Challenge, and this time they just dropped the balls down the tube and steered them to launch off and, take a guess.. break tiles!   They had four members holding up the tube, while for some reason they needed two members up top to drop the balls down it.  LaFlor put Kelly Shinn and Brenda Lowe up top, while Espada used the king of challenges, Benry, as well as Alina.  Kelly and Brenda worked about as well together as Marty and Jane would, and they were really just dominated by Benry and Alina.   On the bright side, we did get to hear Kelly Shinn speak a little more again, twice this episode, easily a new record for her.

Congrats again to the Espada tribe, finally winning when it’s really far too late for the older players to have a real shot at it.

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Marty and sash talking about immunity idol

Can I Have Your Idol? Sure!

In the 10 minutes between the challenge and tribal council were probably the most entertaining of the night, and shocking of the season.   Brenda and Sash decided to offer Marty and chance to stay in the game in exchange for the immunity idol, so Sash sits Marty down and basically tells him that it’s him or Jill going home tonight and the only way he can guarantee he stay in the game is by using the idol.   Being a former Yahoo! exec, I thought Marty was going to see right through that and realize that playing the immunity idol will also guarantee he stay in the game for a week, and as he learned last week, with a little manipulation, anything can happen with a tie-breaker (it would have been Jill 2 and Jane or Brenda 2).  It would have just taken the “grandmaster of chess” a few minutes alone with Fabio to convince him that leaving Jill in the game is a far better move than leaving Jane in…

… but, Sash was really able to convince Marty to give him the idol, which absolutely guaranteed either him or Jill going home that night.   Yes, every season it seems one person makes a huge bone-headed move, and that was definitely it for this season (although it wouldn’t shock me if someone made a worse move later on).

Tribal Council

Oops, Sash said something shocking

Sash After His Slip

Tribal Council was a bit stale, with Marty calling out Jane as the flip flopper she is, and her taking it with no argument back.  Then talk of the idol came out and it was revealed that Marty gave it to Sash, so Jeff tried hard to make something out of nothing when he caught Sash in a little slip up.   He was asked if he’d be willing to just give the idol to Brenda right there, and Sash said “if there’s a time when I lose trust in them… ” with a dramatic Jeff reaction, and a less than dramatic reaction from the tribe with Kelly Shinn staring off into space probably still thinking of milking cows.   Yes, Sash will have to turn on some of his 5 person alliance eventually if he wants to make it to the final 3, so that’s not much of a shock really, but now he does have the power to help do so, thanks to the gift from Marty.

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And thanks to Marty’s mistake, tonight’s elimination was….

Dr Jill voted off survivor nicaragua

Good-Bye Jill

Dr. Jill

3 votes Jill | 2 votes Marty | 2 votes Jane

Here is a full gallery of the episode

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