In case you haven’t heard, I started a spin-off to The Reality Junkies called Teen Mom Junkies and it’s all about…you guessed it: Teen Mom, Teen Mom 2, and 16 and Pregnant! With season 3 of Teen Mom premiering tomorrow, I wanted there to be a one-stop shop for all your Teen Mom episode recaps, information, and news. The site is teenmomjunkies.com. You can also find me on Facebook and Twitter.
I hope everyone is having a safe and happy 4th of July weekend! <3
Itsyoursexlife.org put out a Public Service Announcement telling all about the joys of cuddling. Now, I have a few things to say about this:
1. The original Teen Moms! I totally missed them!
2. Why is Maci blonde? I’m not sure how I feel about that. What do you think?
3. They probably were cuddling at first. Cuddling leads to other things, which leads to having babies, which leads to starring in television shows. I’m just joking, kids. Don’t try this at home.
The most exciting news about this: Teen Mom is coming back for a third season, which premieres July 5th, and they’re already signed up for a fourth season too! At this point though, they’re no longer teens. In fact, they’re now about the same age I was when I became a mom. I don’t know about you, but I think I mostly miss Ryan. He kind of reminds me of Adam from Teen Mom 2, except that Ryan is actually likeable.
As an additional thought, Teen Mom names are taking over. The most popular baby names of 2010 have been released and Bentley (Maci and Ryan’s son) is at spot 101, and Maci is at 232. Sophia (Farrah’s daughter) is at number 2, but I’m pretty sure that’s been up there for a long time. What name is your favorite?
Look, I understand having a baby with a complete lunatic, but your 15 minutes are up, and no random tweets about your love life (or lack thereof) will change that. You want to get back in the news? Do something entertaining, like start dating someone like Leah, I hear she’s single.
The only thing worse than Amber Portwood being a mom is Amber Portwood being a mom again. Rumor has it that Amber is pregnant again. However, unlike when Farrah Abraham was supposedly pregnant, we don’t have an elusive baby bump to go on. We just have hearsay, which is always a reliable source (note: sarcasm). Either Amber is addicted to peeing on sticks or she’s freaking out over the possibility she might be pregnant and is taking pregnancy test after pregnancy test, all of which have been positive. Yet, at a doctor’s visit, she was told it was negative. So is Amber pregnant or not? Who knows! I think, the real story here is that, if she is pregnant, she won’t know who the father is.
Oh, Amber, how we have missed the trainwreck that is you.
So everyone’s (nobody’s) favorite whiny Teen Mom, Farrah Abraham, was spotted recently in a skimpy bikini showing off her new “assets” that MTV clearly paid for. I guess she somehow took time out of her busy schedule of hating her mother to find a bikini that barely fits and strut around showing off the implants that clearly don’t fit her body at all.
But, to be fair, at least she’s just hanging out on the beach showing off her body opposed to, you know, hanging out in jail.
More pictures after the jump
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People Magazine is reporting the ever-so-lovely Amber Portwood has been officially arrested and is being held in jail for 24 hours after turning herself in. A warrant was issued for her arrest yesterday, and I’m sure she took this opportunity to get all dolled up because you never know if you’ll meet the man of your dreams in jail. The only bad part about this is I don’t think MTV was recording the events for the next season. It would have been great to see Amber go to jail and come out with a few guys phone numbers, then watch as she speed dates when they’re released.
Oh well, maybe her next arrest. Anyway, details of the story:
“Domestic battery has an automatic 24 hold,” an officer at the Madison County jail in Anderson, Ind., where Portwood is being held told PEOPLE. “Even if someone pays your bond, you still have to wait 24 hours to be released.”
Earlier on Monday, Portwood was charged by the Madison County prosecutor with three felonies, including two counts of domestic battery and one count of neglect of a dependent. She was also charged with one misdemeanor charge of domestic battery. She was booked at 4:21 p.m. and bail was set at $5,000.
Enjoy your time in jail, Amber. I hope this is a little reality check for you. Probably not, though.
Now that Teen Mom’s Amber Portwood is realizing she could actually be in trouble for beating the shit out of her boyfriend, Gary Shirley, it’s time for the excuses to fly. In an interview with National Enquirer (realize source here), an “insider” was quoted as saying:
“Amber knows she needs a good defense, and reality show producers are known to stage scenes, so she thinks it’s believable.
“She says that the producers were concerned because they don’t get much drama from the other moms.
“They told her that she and Gary were the most popular couple on the show and that they would pay her extra to provoke a fight. Amber says Gary didn’t know about it because they wanted a ‘spontaneous’ reaction from him.”
Even if this story is true, I’m not buying it at all. Amber is a head case, and she’s been in a dysfunctional relationship with Gary for as long as the show has aired, and we’re supposed to suddenly believe that she took money to be what she already is, crazy! Amber and Gary may be the most popular part of the show, but I don’t think MTV needs to pay Amber any extra to get it like that. They saw gold in her during 16 and Pregnant which is why she was selected to do the Teen Mom show. To think they would need to pay her to be crazy is like saying they pay “The Situation” to be sleazy, or “Snookie” to be skanky. Shit like that just comes natural for them, as does Ambers behavior.